TITLE: A Day Late, A Dollar Short
AUTHOR: Gabi Fisher
SPOILER WARNING: none
SUMMARY: Scully has a conversation with Mulder, but it's just a little too late.
DISCLAIMER: I dont own them, Im not pretending to, CC, Fox, 1013, etc. does. No infringement intended.
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"Hi, Mulder," Scully said softly. She wasnt exactly why she spoke softly, but she kept her voice low throughout the entire conversation. "Mom says hi too. She also says shes sorry she couldnt come and talk to you. She promised to come by and say hi soon though. She says she misses you. I miss you too.
"Ive been pretty good lately. They gave me back the X-Files after you... left. I also got a new partner. I dont know if you know herAgent Cassidy. Shes tall and blonde. She has really pretty brown eyes. Youd think theyd give me someone my height after all those years with you, but I just get another tall partner," Scully said with a smile and a slight chuckle.
"Agent Cassidy, Jackie, is really nice. We both go by first names, now, though I do sometimes slip up and continue calling her by her last name. She just laughs and says I spent too much time with you. Jackie doesnt remember you, but Ive told her a lot about you. Dont worryI havent told her anything to embarrassing. I think you would have liked her. She isnt as willing to believe as you were, but not as skeptical as me. We get along well, though I miss our battling of ideas. Jackie is willing to listen and go along with my theories much more easily that you did. I suppose thats the only nice thing about you leaving," Scully mirthlessly laughed. "Who am I kidding? There was nothing good about you leaving."
Scully was silent for a moment, choosing her next words carefully, as if Mulder would be upset with her if she phrased them badly. With a smile, she started, "We finally found Samantha. We found her Mulder! Isnt that wonderful? The notes you had left us helped us figure out where she was, and we found her. By now, you must have known that she wasnt dead. You must have known that she was out there, somewhere. You never gave up hope, never stopped searching and I hope you know that it wasnt in vain.
"Samanthas memories were buried deep within her subconscious by the men who kidnapped her all those years ago, and they began to surface these past few months. Samantha says that her memories of her childhood are slow to be recovered, though she does remember you. She vaguely remembers her kidnapping, but adamantly names the kidnapper as Cancer Man. Im not sure yet how he did it, but we will get to the bottom of it someday. I wont give up on it. If its the last thing I do, I will solve your sisters mystery," Scully said before pausing, fierce determination in her words.
Scully took a deep breath before continuing. "Samantha wanted to meet you, and I said maybe one day I would bring her here. Not for a while though. For now this is my only place of solace, and I want to be alone with you here."
Scully had barely noticed her smile dissolve into a frown. She didnt even realize that tears had started to slowly glide down her cheeks until she was choking with every breath she took. "Oh, God! Why you, Mulder?! Why you?!" she choked out the anguish-filled words. Gradually, Scully succumbed to her tears and sank to the ground, her hands covering her face.
As her sobs subsided to silent, calmer tears, Scullys sadness and remorse changed to anger. She was angry with God, her life, and most of alland most pointlesslyat Mulder. Had there been anything heavy enough to throw, it would have been yards from Scully. "How could you leave me, Mulder? When I needed you most, how could you go? Why didnt you understand how much I needed you? How much I loved you?" Scully screamed. There was no one else around Scully to hear her screaming, but she would not have cared if there was. "What the hell did you do, Mulder, to deserve dying? What did I do to deserve it?"
No answers came to Scully, and none were expected. Scully sat on the freshly laid sod before the cold, gray headstone, letting the anger seep out of her. She fingered the grass, scarcely registering the rain that began to fall.
At Mulders small funeral service, she had kept her composure, only her quiet weeping during part of the service hinting at her inner turmoil. Afraid of a breakdown, Scully had stayed far away from the cemetery for the first week, refusing time off from work, needing to keep herself busy. Skinner had understood, and promised her time off later, when she would need it. A new partner was assigned to Scully only three days after Mulders car accident death and the workload given to them was light. Scully, however, threw herself into her work, doing more than was needed or expected, despite her being told to take it easy.
Five days after Mulders death Samantha was found in an abandoned warehouse. All signs of life or residence had been carefully removed, though Samantha had been taken care of well. She remembered little, most likely due to whatever memory regression had been used on her, but small bits and pieces surfaced and eventually, Scully hoped, Samantha would remember everything. She was only sorry that Mulder had not been around when Samantha was found.
A week after Mulders burial, Scully had finally gained the courage and strength to visit Mulder. All the emotions she had kept penned up finally broke free, leaving Scully drained and numb. Scully wasnt sure how she would live without Mulder and his constant support, but she was certain that she was not about to give up. She would keep going, keep fighting for the Truth, for everything they had fought for together.
With the new hope she had found in herself, Scully placed the bouquet of flowers she had set down on the ground earlier closer to the headstone. "I will continue fighting for us, Mulder. And I will never stop loving you. I will love you forever," Scully whispered, placing her hand on the ground, almost as if she was trying to touch Mulder one last time.
Summoning the little inner strength she had left, Scully stood and began to walk to her car, taking one last glance at the short quote under Mulders name. It was a small reminder of what she had to fight for, even though her partner, friend, soul-mate was no longer there to fight by her side.
"The Truth is Out There."
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